Do a U Turn by Lynda McMahon

 

Travel north on Endeavour Road.

At the next roundabout take the first exit signposted ‘Success’.

Continue on this road for forty years.

Your destination will be on the right.

 

Travel north on Endeavour Road.

Travel north! Make a U Turn!

Redirecting…

At the next roundabout take the fourth exit.

Redirecting…

Continue on the Road to Nowhere for several decades.

Your destination was in the other direction.

 

Travel north on Endeavour Road.

Travel north! Do a U turn!

Listen to me before it’s too late,

Do a U turn now!

What’s the point of asking for directions if you don’t listen to me?

Ok. Once, just once, I directed you into a cul-de-sac but I’m usually spot on so why won’t you  turn round?

That’s better. Back on track.

At the first roundabout…

What do you mean you don’t fancy the look of the first exit? It’s perfectly ordinary. Too ordinary?! Do you want to succeed or not? You do? Ok, then.

Continue on this road for forty years.

Forty years sounds boring? Let me tell you what’s boring! Giving instructions to complete idiots that think they know better. You know what? I quit! So you were ‘just saying’? Well don’t. No, I’m not sulking.

Your destination is on the right.

You thought it would be different? You thought you’d be happy when you got there? This is Success, mate, not Nirvana. That’s me done! Get yourself another SatNav. I’m going where I’ll be appreciated. Find your own way home!