'New and Improved Feline Day Planner' by Caroline Gonda

 

24 December

 

 

 

1.  Wake human for morning feed. If no response to vocal warning, bite foot under bedding.

 

2.  Complain about quality of food.

 

3.  Eat food.

 

4.  Complain about absence of food.

 

5.  Continue tests on kitchen worktop. Results on chewed area inconclusive so far.

 

6.  Repeat steps 2 through 4.

 

7.  Demolish low-hanging shiny objects on unexpected indoor tree.

 

8.  Climb unexpected indoor tree.

 

9.  Reproach human for collapse of unexpected indoor tree. If necessary, follow up with mouse in water-bowl.

 

10.  Mouse stair-flinging. Suggest moving this activity to night shift for maximum effect.

 

11.  Repeat step 6.

 

12.  Sleep.

'Operation Be Gone Interlopers – Monday' by Suzanna Lundale

 

06:00 Double-check bloody footprints along hallway ceiling and west wall

07:00 – 08:00 Repeatedly move things during breakfast prep & consumption when they aren’t looking

08:00 – 09:00 Slam books & drop mid-weight items every 5 minutes during Karen’s Zoom meeting in the next room

09:00 – 10:00 Break to recoup strength & lend a false sense of security

10:00 – 12:00 Focus on Randy – hover items on the periphery of his vision, intersperse with faint whispers

12:00 – 13:00 – Assess K & R mental state to determine whether to pursue Medium or Nuclear path for afternoon

13:00 – 14:00 – Karen Zoom call – flash messages in blood on the wall behind her for her to see on-screen

14:00 – 14:30 – (assuming Nuclear, because let’s be honest, this has gone on too long) Lay out K & R’s best outfits on the respective sides of their bed, as if in repose; render them shredded & bloody first

14:30 – 16:00 Gather pebbles on the property & apply ectoplasm, so they will glow in the dark; arrange into message LEAVE WHILE YOU MAY, INTERLOPERS, visible from bedroom window

16:00 – 17:00 Rest for final push

17:00 – 18:00 General oddities & unexplained noises while K & R finish meal prep

18:00 – 19:00 Show-time: Whispers building to moans over course of meal; centerpiece: animate the chicken in a dance while singing, “Hello, my baby! Hello, my honey! Hello, my ragtime gal!” Finish with chicken bowing to both K & R

19:00 – bedtime General low-level harassment: phantom footsteps, whispers, moans, fragments of aforementioned song

* Note: If need be, taps on bedroom window to ensure they look out to see message

'SMART Goals' by Donna M Day

Specific:

1. I will marry Michael
2. We will have two children
3. You will regret the day you met me

Measurable:

1. I will have an amazing wedding
2. We will show our children to the world
3. You will weep and hide

Achievable:

1. I will make Michael fall in love with me
2. We will be blessed twice
3. You will not be able to stop me

Realistic:

1. I will not expect to keep him forever
2. We will not assume we’ll get one of each
3. You will try, but you will not succeed

Timely:

1. It will take one year to move his affections
2. It will take another year to have our first baby
3. It will take a lifetime for you to recover

'Monday Morning Things To Do' by Nisha Patel

• Press snooze
• And again 5 minutes later
• Get out of bed
• Shower
• Quickly get ready
• Wake up the girls
• Resist the urge to pick up my phone
• Cajole the girls to clean their teeth but not with the threat that their teeth will fall out because they want the tooth fairy to come.
• Hurry the girls to eat 
• Get them changed into their uniforms
• Break up a fight
• Comb their hair
• Ask them to put their shoes and coat on
• And again
• And once more
• Breathe
• Remind them to pick up their bags
• Get them into the car
• Breathe
• Go to school
• Extract the youngest off my leg and into her class
• Wave the eldest off
• Drive home
• Breathe and relax
• Put the kettle on 
• Put laptop on
• Try and sip my too-hot coffee without burning my tongue while checking my list of things to do
• Start working
• Do some things I forgot to put on my to-do list and add it on so I can tick them off
• Do one thing on my actual to-do list
• Finish work
• Pick up the girls who now want to play with their friends
• Dodge the speeding cars around blind corners
• Sit in a traffic jam
• Finally, get home
• Cook the girls dinner while trying to make them do some homework
• Feed the girls
• Cook our dinner
• Leave the husband to get them ready for bed
• Go shopping
• Buy too much food and clothes and toys and other things that I don't really need but make sure I fold the receipt and put it away properly so that I can return it later
• Check on the girls
• Eat with my husband while watching TV for our couples time together in the evening
• Copy and paste the to-do list for tomorrow.
• Go to bed

'Vampirism in One Week - the Plan' by Heather Haigh

Sunday - Locate the carotid artery, the sweet tap root that will supply life and strength. You'll know it's rich coppery scent. Nothing like the smell of rubber, silicon and antiseptic. Choose exactly where your teeth will pierce the flesh, and don't be tempted to mumble, 'just a scratch, Dear.' Only Eddie in bed seven believes that one. He can't remember yesterday. Savour the taste, nothing like watery soup.

Saturday - Isolate whose footsteps are approaching your room. The crisp tap of your consultant's brogues, the leathery creak of the house doctor, the muffled tap tap of Nurse Peterson's hush puppies, the barely audible shuffle of Jayne's trainers. Jayne who feeds you and wipes your chin. Forget the beeping of machines, the rattle of obs trolleys and drug carts, the hissing of the oxygen tank. 

Friday - Don't listen to the stranger that calls in the night with his weird offer, impossible promises, sharp teeth, his dead eyes. Then do.

Thursday - Stare at the book on the bedside cabinet: Embracing Change by Doctor H Barry.

Wednesday - Cry. Silently.

Tuesday - Don't open your eyes when you hear Sister say, 'he'll need a comprehensive care package. Won't manage much himself.' Don't make a sound. Keep breathing.

Monday- Resist that button: more pain, less sleep, more life, more everything.

#

Tomorrow begins a new week. You're ready now.

'To-Do List for the Last Week of Term' by Hilary Ayshford

 

Monday – Make packed lunch for Conrad's school outing.

Realise you forgot to ask whether this is a triangle sandwich week or if we've gone back to squares, and whether crusts are acceptable or not.

 

Tuesday – Phone the school to find out who has Conrad's blazer.

He came home from the trip wearing a jacket that has seen better days and is at least three sizes too big for him. You understand how Conrad would find this entirely normal, but how would the teachers not have noticed?

 

Wednesday – Make sure Conrad has his swimming kit in his school bag.

His trunks are not in the airing cupboard where you put them last week. Search the house and finally discover them, sopping wet, under the kitchen sink. Don't be tempted to ask Conrad to explain his reasoning, as his logic will trigger a migraine. Dig out spare pair and hope Conrad will consent to wear them.

 

Thursday -  Pack cupcakes in Tupperware box, labelled with Conrad's name, ready for class end-of-term picnic.

Explain to Conrad that sharing does not mean he should hand out the cakes to everyone on the bus on the way to school. He needs to save them for this afternoon to share with his classmates.

 

Friday – Put presents and cards for Conrad's teachers in his bag.

Feel sad that this is Conrad's last day of term. Wonder how you are going to cope with him on your own for the next six weeks. Even though he will never be like other boys, shed a few quiet tears of pride at how far he has come against all the odds.

 

Saturday - Make a list of all the things you can do together.

'The Working Mom’s Day' by Melissa Anderson

5 am Alarm set, but don’t worry the 5-yr-old woke you up 30 mins ago 

5-6 am Shower and get dressed while 5-yr-old claws at your ankles because he is a zombie dog this morning

6-7 am Scarf down toast, make sure kid's bag is packed, lunch made, rush out the door, drive 45 min to work

7-8 am Settle at desk to work on a project that is overdue, but receive Slack message that something urgent has come up 

8-8:30 am Draft a crisis comm message

8:30-11 am Track down executives to sign off on it

11-12 Boss appears with another urgent task so work on that while waiting for execs to sign off on first item

12-1 pm Skip lunch; keep working

1-3 pm Leadership team meeting; finally get sign off on message

3-4 pm Send off urgent message from the morning

4-5pm Drive home 

5-6pm Make dinner while 5-yr-old asks for snacks 4,000x

6-7pm Kid refuses to eat the prepped dinner and instead eats three yogurts, fruit snacks and 15 graham crackers; eat own dinner at the sink while washing dishes 

7-8pm Bedtime for child which includes four books, three lullabies, seven trips out of bed to tell you he's not tired yet

8-9pm Check work email and finish up tasks from the morning 

9-10pm go to bed with husband and stream shows until both of you are snoring 

10-midnight Sleep

Midnight-1 am Child wakes you up because he’s cold, he lost a stuffed animal or a dinosaur is in the room; offer backrubs to settle child to sleep

1-2 am Lie awake in own bed

2 am Husband wakes up with insomnia and leaves bed to watch TV on the couch 

2-4:30am sleep soundly until the kid wakes you up again

NFFD 2023 Prompt #6: Time will tell....

 

Time will tell....

Welcome to The Write-In!  This year, we're celebrating the 2023 National Flash Fiction Day Anthology theme of time.  Throughout National Flash Fiction Day, we'll be posting one time-related prompt on the hour every hour from now until midnight (BST), for a total of 25 prompts in all.  You have until midnight on Sunday (BST) to submit your responses for possible publication here at the Write-In.  We'll start posting responses on Sunday, 25 June 2023....

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Write a flash in the form of a daily planner page, a weekly to-do list spread, or a timetable.  (If you use visual elements, feel free to send us an image of your piece.)

 

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If you’re submitting this to us, make sure to note that this is a response to Prompt 6: Time will tell....

You can submit responses until 23:59 BST on Sunday, 25 June 2023 for a chance to be published here at The Write-In.

You can claim the badge for this prompt until 23:59 BST on Sunday, 2 July 2023 by going to the here (hosted by the NFFD website).